


Do You Miss Him?

by Quesadilla28



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Crying, Eventual Fluff, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Sleepy Bois Inc as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 11:42:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29313513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quesadilla28/pseuds/Quesadilla28
Summary: Being president was a lonely job... Tubbo was lonely.Sure he had Fundy, Quackity, and Ranboo, but it wasn’t the same....“Hey, kid?”Tubbo froze at the sound of Schlatt’s voice and slowly turned around.
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Kudos: 22





	Do You Miss Him?

Tubbo sighed softly as he swung his legs back and forth through the air. He missed Tommy… The younger boy had been in exile for nearly two weeks now and Tubbo was bored out of his mind.  
Tommy would always have something for them to do together, let it be to cause trouble or annoy one of their brothers.  
But now, Techno had ‘retired’, Tommy was in exile, and Wilbur… Wilbur wasn’t around anymore.  
The president of L’Manburg was lonely. Sure he had Fundy, Quackity, and Ranboo, but they all had their own things to take care of.  
Fundy and Ranboo were hanging out with HBomb at some fancy lake.  
And Quackity, to be honest, Tubbo didn’t have a clue what took up so much of the older man’s time. The raven haired man’s world had been shaken when Schlatt had died, they were lovers after all. And when Wilbur had returned as Ghostbur, Quackity had lost it on the cheerful ghost. Demanding to know why he was back and not Schlatt, why whatever God above had deemed Wilbur good enough to be given basically a second chance at life when he was just as bad as Schlatt.  
Ghostbur had frozen in place as Quackity had screamed at him, whispering apologies under his breath as Tubbo and Fundy held the raven haired man back.  
Tubbo hadn’t had the same relationship with Schlatt that Quackity had, but he’d still felt a sort of connection to the ram hybrid. The older man may have been harsh and cruel, and had almost killed the younger, but Tubbo was still drawn to him.  
Was Tubbo sad that Schlatt had died and hadn’t been revived as a ghost?  
Not particularly, seeing as that the ram hybrid had been so destructive that he’d ended his own life along with the country he was commanding. But he did slightly miss the older man.  
Tubbo just sighed again. He closed his eyes, basking in the warm sunlight.  
“Hey, kid?”  
The brunet’s eyes shot open at the familiar voice, a spear of terror piercing his heart. “S-Schlatt?!” He turned towards the voice and moved farther away on the bench. “Ghostbur?”  
The yellow ghost was now a transparent cerulean, with large ram horns protruding from either side of his head. Soft-looking brown curls fell in front of the ghost’s eye, a faint smile curling his lips with a small fang poking out over his bottom lip.  
“Do I know you?” the ghost asked.  
“How are you alive? You died!” Tubbo whispered in horror. “You had a heart attack.”  
“Oh. Is that what this is?” The ghost pulled down the collar of his blue jumper, exposing a bright yellow heart on the left side of his chest.  
Confusion flashed across Tubbo’s face and he flinched as the ghost floated next to him on the bench. He forced himself to stay calm as the Schlatt-Wilbur fusion gazed out over L’Manburg before glancing over at him curiously. “You’re Tubbo, right?”  
The brunet nodded hesitantly.  
“I remember you. You were a sweet kid,” Schlatt’s voice murmured. “You and that Tommy guy are friends.”  
Tubbo swallowed. “I don’t know if we’re still friends, actually. I exiled him.”  
“Why?”  
“I had to.”  
Schlatt’s ghost made a soft humming sound and he scratched behind his horns. “Do you have a family?”  
Tubbo furrowed his eyebrows at the odd question, especially coming from the alcoholic dead man. “Kinda, yeah. You know that already though.”  
“Oh, yeah. Wilbur, Tommy, and Technoblade are your brothers.”  
“Yep. And Phil’s my adoptive father.”  
“Adoptive?”  
The teenager nodded slowly. “I never met my real parents. I was abandoned when I was little,” he murmured. “Why are you back, Schlatt?”  
“I don’t know… I was in a white room or some shit when Wilbur grabbed me. Now I’m here.”  
“Mmm,” Tubbo nodded. He jumped slightly as a cold transparent hand rested on his shoulder.  
“I think… that I have to go soon, Tubbo,” Schlatt admitted, loud voice unnaturally soft and timid.  
The young boy bit his lip, willing the moisture in his eyes away. “Yeah, yeah, I figured. Schlatt?”  
“Hmm?”  
“Big Q misses you.”  
“Big Q… Oh, Alex! He misses me?” A wide grin spread across the ghost’s face. “Can you tell him I still love him?”  
Tubbo nodded and smiled gently.  
“I had a kid once, you know.”  
“Really?”  
“Yeah, a son. He looked like me too, nothing like his mother. Had to give him up though, couldn’t afford to take care of him.”  
The young brunet looked over at Schlatt’s ghostly form. “I’m sorry.”  
“Wasn’t your fault, kid. He loved bees… had the cutest little horns like mine… I loved that kid more than anything in the damn world.”  
Tubbo froze as tears pricked at his blue eyes again. “What was his name?”  
The ghost smiled weakly as his horns began to vanish, his faint blue glow fading into a bright yellow. “His name was Toby.”  
The teenager blinked a flood of tears from his eyes and flung himself at the ghost, choked sobs falling from his lips when he couldn’t wrap his arms around the ram hybrid.  
Schlatt gently pet Tubbo’s chestnut hair with a hand, pausing the light motions as his see-through fingers brushed against half-grown horns protruding from the boy’s skull, hidden under his long mop of dark hair. “Oh… it’s you. My little Toby.”  
Tubbo sobbed softly as he continued in vain to try and wrap his arms around his father. He looked up with teary eyes at the older man, heart sinking even further as Schlatt’s horns disappeared and the blue glow had almost entirely shifted back to yellow. “Schlatt?”  
“It’s okay, kiddo. You’ll see me again someday. But… just in case… Go find Alex, ask for the keys to my old office, okay?”  
Tubbo nodded, bottom lip quivering.  
“Look under my desk for a chest, the key is taped to the inside of the liquor cabinet. Got it?”  
Another nod. “Schlatt, I-”  
“Toby, I gotta go now,” Schlatt whispered, one hand stroking brown hair and the other trying to wipe away Tubbo’s tears. “I love you, kid, always have.”  
Tubbo gasped for air as a burst of bright light emitted from Schlatt’s chest and the fondness in deep brown eyes faded until there was nothing left.  
“Hi, Tubbo,” Ghostbur smiled warmly.  
The teenager gaped at the vibrant yellow ghost before breaking down into heavy sobs again, clutching roughly at his arms as his shoulders shook.  
The ghost of the L’Manburg president hurried to hand the brunet some blue, frantically adjusting his red beanie as it began to slip from his head.  
Tubbo sniffled, rubbing at his nose and eyes with the sleeves of his green shirt. “Ghostbur, where’s Quackity?”  
“I think he was at Karl’s house with Sapnap… Why?”  
The brunet ignored the ghost’s question and began to run towards Karl’s house, panting heavily as he tried to catch his breath.  
Quackity looked up from where he was strumming his guitar next to Sapnap. “Tubbo?” He noticed the tears streaming down the boy’s cheeks and concern flickered on his dark eyes.  
“I need the keys to Schlatt’s office.”  
“What? Why?”  
“Big Q, I need the keys. Now.”  
Sapnap eyed Quackity warily before glancing back at the brunet. “Tubbo… Are you-?”  
“Shut up, Sapnap! The keys!”  
Taken aback by the president’s outburst, Quackity pulled the key ring from his pocket and placed it in Tubbo’s outstretched hand.  
“Thank you,” he hissed softly, turning and sprinting for the White House.  
Quackity moved to follow the younger boy when Sapnap grabbed his arm.  
“Leave him.”  
“Wha- Sapnap, he was fucking crying. He-”  
“He has horns,” Sapnap murmured. “Like Schlatt’s. Put the pieces together, Alex.”  
Quackity’s eyes narrowed. “What are you… Oh my God.”

Tubbo twisted the key in the office lock, flinching at the loud click. He pushed the door open slowly, glancing around the room fearfully.  
Schlatt’s office was abandoned, an even coat of dust covering everything. Tommy was the one to lock up this office, not wanting Tubbo’s new office to be in the same place as Schlatt’s.  
But now the room felt eerie. As if it had never been used before and if anyone were to disturb it, they would suffer the consequences.  
Tubbo wasn’t afraid of that however. He was afraid of the man who used to sit behind that dark oak desk and drink whiskey by the bottle. The man who would keep protein powder hidden around the entire White House just to irritate Quackity.  
Regardless of whether or not Schlatt was his biological father, Tubbo still felt fear towards the older man. He had tried to kill him after all. But… that was a different Schlatt, Tubbo supposed.  
He crept into the office silently and crouched under the desk, pulling the large wooden chest towards him. There was a large golden lock on the front of the box and Tubbo rattled the lock before placing the box onto the top of the desk.  
He strode over to the liquor cabinet and pulled the doors open, trying to avoid looking at the varying collection of bottles within it. Tubbo ran his hand over the inside of the cabinet, withdrawing a small bronze key that was taped to the cabinet door. He returned over to the desk and brushed a layer of dust from the chest.  
With a deep breath, Tubbo inserted the key into the golden lock and unlocked the chest. He forced himself to hold back a second bout of tears as he went through the chest, a watery smile forming on his lips.  
His fingers closed around a worn bee plushie and he blinked as a tear fell onto the soft yellow fabric. He set the stuffed bee aside and pulled out an envelope full of old photographs. Painstakingly flipping through them, Tubbo continued to sniffle, wiping his tears away to avoid them dripping onto the delicate photos.  
There was a picture of a younger Schlatt sitting on a couch, horns not yet fully grown in, holding a small, brown haired baby boy that was chewing on a green teething ring. The older ram hybrid had a large grin on his face as he ruffled the boy’s short hair.  
Tubbo inhaled shakily as he rifled through the next few photographs before pausing to study one intently.  
In this photo, Schlatt was asleep in bed, the boy laying on top of him with his face pressed into the older man’s chest, serene expressions on both their faces and the child’s hand wrapped in Schlatt’s shirt.  
Trembling fingers closed around a small tape and Tubbo chewed on the inside of his cheek as he pushed it into the Walkman that was also inside the chest. He pressed pause and took another glance around the empty room before putting on the attached headphones. Tubbo set the tape back to the start and hesitantly pressed the play button. 

“This tape and everything in this chest is only meant for my son, so if you aren’t him, fuck off and mind your own business.”

Tubbo laughed quietly at the ram hybrid and went silent as Schlatt began talking again.

“Toby, I doubt you’ll ever find this tape. And I know you’ll probably hate me for giving you up, and I don’t blame you… I’ve hated myself for abandoning you every day of my damn life, but I-I wouldn’t have done it if I had any other choice.  
“I could barely get enough money to keep food on the fucking table, let alone try and take care of a baby. But I loved you, kiddo, so damn much. You were my world, Toby, and I don’t say shit like that lightly.  
“I think you loved me too. You always loved when I got too tired to put you back in your crib and you fell asleep on top of me. Or when I finally saved up enough to get that bee for your second birthday… Actually, I think there’s a picture of you in here when you opened it.”

Tubbo instantly paused the tape and flipped through the pictures again. His wet blue eyes scanned the photo as another sniffle escaped him.  
It was a picture of a young Tubbo clutching the bee plush to his chest, the wide smile on his lips stretching from ear to ear. There was wrapping paper stuck to the green onesie he was wearing and a golden bow was stuck to the top of his head.  
After months of working under Schlatt, Tubbo immediately recognized the ram hybrid’s elegant script in the bottom of the photo. 

Merry Christmas, Toby,  
Love, Dad.

Tubbo rubbed at his eyes, choosing to hit play again before he lost his resolve. 

“If you think that this is all just some kind of sick joke, ask your parents or whatever how they found you. I left you in a box on the doorstep of one of my old friends. You were only three years old… you were wrapped up in a blue blanket and one of my old sweatshirts because you wouldn’t let me put you down otherwise.  
“I told you that I’d come back, but I never did. And I wish I did, I missed out on watching my own fucking kid grow up. Missed out on chasing away your first girlfriend... or boyfriend, whoever you ended up with.  
“I’m just glad I got to see some of your firsts. Like when you first walked. I was sitting on the couch eating cereal while you played with your toys, when you walked over and stole my spoon.  
“It was actually pretty funny, I was trying so hard to get the spoon back before you ate it or some shit that I didn’t even realize that you had walked for the first time.  
“And the first time you talked… you were a little older than one. I’d just gotten home from the store and was about to start dinner when I heard you talk. Your first words were ‘Daddy, wanna cookie’. I absolutely lost my shit, hugging the hell out of you and trying not to cry. You, on the other hand, thought you did something wrong and then you started to cry. I let you have cookies and ice cream for dinner that night.”

Tubbo smiled weakly and ran his fingers over the bee again. 

“Anyway… I just wanted to say-” 

Schlatt’s sentence was cut off by another voice that Tubbo had learned to fear after the last few years. Dream…

“Schlatt, let’s go. I don’t have all day,” Dream snapped impatiently.  
“I know, gimme a minute,” Schlatt’s voice snapped. The faint sound of a door slamming registered on the tape and Schlatt sighed deeply.  
“If you’re hearing this, I’m probably long gone. I’m heading into a war, Toby, one that I don’t think I’ll be coming out of. It’s probably for the best…  
“I’m not a good leader, never have been. I pushed my own fucking fiancé away, banished an old friend, and nearly killed one of the nicest kids I’ve ever met.”

Tubbo straightened in the office chair at the words, blue eyes swimming with emotion.

“I think you would’ve liked Tubbo if you’d have met him. He was always talking about something or other, but it was kinda cute seeing how excited he got about everything. To be honest, he reminds me of you a bit.  
“But, I’m running out of time to tell you everything, so everything of yours, and even some of my old stuff if you want it, is in this chest. The last thing I wanna say is how much I regret giving you up, it really was the greatest mistake of my life.  
“It might be selfish to say things like that, especially because everything I did that night was to give you a better life that I couldn’t give you, but I can’t help it. Facing death head-on really does give you perspective, I guess.  
“I love you, Toby, and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me...”

The tape ended with those words, leaving Tubbo sitting alone in his father’s old study, tears rolling down his cheeks as he hugged the bee plushie to his chest.

*A few days later...*

Tubbo knocked on the door and glared up at his oldest brother, his firm expression leaving no room for stalling. “Technoblade.”  
“Tubbo,” the older man muttered, towering over the short president of L’Manburg at a solid seven feet tall.  
“Where’s Phil?”  
Techno’s dark red eyes narrowed. “Why?”  
“It doesn’t concern you,” Tubbo stated.  
The piglin hybrid growled softly. “I’m not in the mood for this, Tubbo.”  
Techno stopped suddenly as a hand was placed on his shoulder and he was moved aside.  
Phil looked down at Tubbo with a weary smile as he stepped outside. “Hey, kiddo.”  
Tubbo forced a smile for his father, waiting patiently as Phil gently pushed Techno inside.  
“How’ve you been, Tubbo?”  
“Fine, I guess… How’d you find me?”  
“What?”  
“When I was a baby. You said you found me, how?”  
Phil rubbed between his eyes lightly as he recalled the memory. “It was in late July, Techno and Will were sparring in their bedrooms and Tommy was only two and a half. I was in the living room with Tommy when someone knocked at the door. I put Tommy down, opened the door and there you were.”  
Tubbo nodded slowly. “Describe it.”  
“You… why?”  
“Does it matter?”  
“You’re asking about it, so yes,” Phil raised an eyebrow.  
“I might’ve found my biological dad,” Tubbo admitted quietly. “I wanna make sure he’s not just messing with me.”  
Phil looked up suddenly and grabbed Tubbo by the shoulder. “Really? Do you want me to kill ‘em?”  
The brunet’s eyes watered as he shook his head, looking away. “No, you can’t...”  
The older blond cocked his head to the side slightly at the odd phrasing, but nodded his agreement. “Ok then. You were in a box on the doorstep of the old house. You were wrapped up in a blue blanket, if I’m remembering correctly, and an old burgundy sweater.” Phil met Tubbo’s eyes and immediately pulled the brunet into his arms at the forlorn expression on his face. “Hey, hey, hey… You’re okay, I’m right here, kiddo.”  
Tubbo wrapped his arms around his adoptive father with a soft whimper, choosing to ignore Techno standing silently in the open doorway and Ranboo’s multi-coloured eyes glinting from within the darkness of the cabin.  
“I take it that he didn’t lie to you,” Phil murmured.  
The brunet nodded sadly. “I-I’m gonna go, I want some space for a while.”  
“Wait… Tubbo? “If you want, I can see if I still have the sweater?”  
“Really?”  
“Yeah,” Phil murmured.  
“I-I’d like that, please.”  
“Okay. I need to look for it though, so you might be waiting for a while.”  
Tubbo inhaled lightly and nodded against Phil’s chest. “That’s okay, thank you, Phil.”  
“Of course, kiddo,” Phil whispered, reluctantly letting Tubbo go and watching his second youngest son walk away into the snow without another word.  
Tubbo dragged out his way back to L’Manburg, a pit forming in his stomach at the thought of living in Schlatt’s old home and in the country where he’d died. But, he had nowhere else to go, so he went back.  
The teenager sat on the bench with a deep sigh, fingers twisting in his oversized shirt. He’d worn one of Schlatt’s shirts that he’d stolen from the ex-president’s old bedroom, somehow finding the faint smell of smoke and whiskey both comforting and nauseating at the same time. Tubbo tensed as someone else sank down next to him, keeping his eyes forward as he stared out at the country he used to call home.  
“Tubbo?”  
“Big Q,” the brunet hummed. “What can I do for you? I’m kinda taking a day off, not feeling very well.”  
The older boy exhaled lightly. “Tubbo, Schlatt’s your father, isn’t he?”  
Tubbo forced his face to remain indifferent. “And why would you think that?”  
“Sapnap… he pointed out that you and Schlatt have the same horns. And one day, he mentioned having a son while we were dating,” Quackity admitted. “I was just wondering…”  
“So what if I am? I’m still president of L’Manburg, you can’t just take my position away from me.”  
Quackity sighed at the indirect confirmation of his suspicions. “That’s not why I’m asking, Tubbo. I’m asking so you know that if you ever need someone to talk to, you can come find me. You know Schlatt and I were engaged, I still love him, even after all the shit he did and even though I have Sap and Karl now.”  
Tubbo huffed softly and turned his head away from Quackity. “He said he loves you too…”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Schlatt came back in Ghostbur’s body… he found me at the bench and we talked until he had to go again, forever this time. He said to tell you that he still loves you and that he misses you. That’s when I found out about him and I.”  
“Oh, Tubbo…” Quackity started.  
“Don’t say that. I’ve had enough of people pitying me. Oh, Tubbo, he’s all alone. Oh, Tubbo, what’s he gonna do with himself now that Tommy’s gone. I’m fucking sick of it.”  
“I’m not- Tubbo… Schlatt, believe it or not, was a good man. It was the drinking and smoking that made him into the president you knew. Before all this, he was the nicest person I’d ever met. Always got me flowers on my birthday and Valentine’s Day, made sure to never miss a date, and always, always, talked about how much he regretted giving you up.”  
“What?” The brunet’s hands stilled in the soft fabric of Schlatt’s shirt and he looked towards Quackity with wide eyes.  
“When we dated, every December 23rd, he’d sit in bed with me almost all day, crying about how much he missed his little boy and how he missed he’d never given you up. I know for a fact, Tubbo, that your dad loved you. Even after all these years, more than anything else on this bitch of an earth, he loved you,” Quackity whispered.  
“That-that’s my birthday,” the brunet repeated. ‘He really did that?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Would you have still dated him? If he still had me?”  
“I think so. I mean I was only seventeen when we got together and was barely ready to start college, let alone try to deal with a kid. But, I’ve always liked you Tubbo, so I think I would’ve made an exception.”  
“You were underage when you started dating my dad?” Tubbo asked quietly, mischief sparkling in his eyes as he tried to hide his smile.  
Quackity sputtered at the question and gave the younger boy a playful pleading look. “Me perdonas?”  
“Hmm… How old was Schlatt?”  
The raven haired teen went red. “He was only twenty one.”  
Tubbo hummed. “Okay, I forgive you.”  
The raven haired teen laughed quietly before glancing over at Tubbo’s shirt. “You found his old clothes?”  
“Yeah. I just wanted a few things of his, I guess. I… I can put them back if you want me to.”  
“It’s fine, Tubbo. It’s more your stuff than mine. He would have wanted you to have it.”  
“Quackity?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Do you miss him?”  
The older teenager smiled and sighed. “Everyday… But I miss the Schlatt who would kiss me on the cheek before he did so much as leave the room. The Schlatt that would cook dinner for us almost every night and put literal hours into everything he made for us. The one who wasn’t a drunken, abusive asshole…” Quackity shook his head slightly and blinked. “That’s the one you should try to think about when you miss your dad. The nice Schlatt who visited you… the one that I loved.”  
Tubbo nodded as he sniffled quietly and Quackity pulled him into a tight hug. “Thanks, Big Q,” he murmured into the older boy’s jacket. “Sorry for yelling at you yesterday.”  
“Don’t mention it, Tubbo. How about you come over for dinner tonight? Karl’s a really good cook.”  
“Really?”  
“Hell yeah,” Quackity grinned. “And Sap will probably spar with you if you ask.”  
“Yeah, yeah, ok.”

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated.


End file.
